Strengths are things we are naturally good at, our character traits that often seem as if they come naturally to us and our gifts that we enjoy using. When we use our strengths we experience flow. What we do comes easily, naturally. Weaknesses are those parts of us akin to handicaps. We may not always be aware of all of our weaknesses, but often we are able to identify them as we feel uncomfortable when using weaknesses.
An Example Of Weakness In Action
If you are adept at dealing with people and love to talk to others you may thoroughly enjoy floating between groups of people at a cocktail party, chatting and getting to know people. Personally I prefer not to attend cocktail parties. Firstly I never know what to do with everything I seem to be holding, a glass in one hand, a plate in another, how does one ever eat adeptly? I may pop something into my mouth and someone sidles up to me and says "hello" and wants to shake my hand. Someone I vaguely remember from somewhere but her name escapes me and I hurriedly try to chew and get rid of the cloying pastry in my mouth so I can mumble a reply, and before I have occasion to answer she is gone. I feel uncomfortable when I am asked to mingle with many people I don't know. Have you experienced looking around you at a social event and seeing small groups everywhere, their bodies forming a barrier to new entrants? Everyone seems to know each other! If I sidle up to join a group, they glance my way and then keep talking, turning slightly to ignore this new intrusion. At such events what I wish for hopefully is that I find a few people I know and am able to get through the evening without too much stress. There are many more such examples of where we may feel out of our depth. Sometimes you have to push through situations, but sometimes it's also a case of accepting who you are and rather placing yourself in situations where you know you will be successful. It's like trying to force yourself to be a public speaker. I believe we should all be able to speak in front of people without feeling at odds, but if you are someone who doesn't know what to say unless you read constantly from a piece of paper, then make sure you don't get up on stage and make speeches for a living!
Be Aware That Strengths May Be Weaknesses
An Example Of Weakness In Action
If you are adept at dealing with people and love to talk to others you may thoroughly enjoy floating between groups of people at a cocktail party, chatting and getting to know people. Personally I prefer not to attend cocktail parties. Firstly I never know what to do with everything I seem to be holding, a glass in one hand, a plate in another, how does one ever eat adeptly? I may pop something into my mouth and someone sidles up to me and says "hello" and wants to shake my hand. Someone I vaguely remember from somewhere but her name escapes me and I hurriedly try to chew and get rid of the cloying pastry in my mouth so I can mumble a reply, and before I have occasion to answer she is gone. I feel uncomfortable when I am asked to mingle with many people I don't know. Have you experienced looking around you at a social event and seeing small groups everywhere, their bodies forming a barrier to new entrants? Everyone seems to know each other! If I sidle up to join a group, they glance my way and then keep talking, turning slightly to ignore this new intrusion. At such events what I wish for hopefully is that I find a few people I know and am able to get through the evening without too much stress. There are many more such examples of where we may feel out of our depth. Sometimes you have to push through situations, but sometimes it's also a case of accepting who you are and rather placing yourself in situations where you know you will be successful. It's like trying to force yourself to be a public speaker. I believe we should all be able to speak in front of people without feeling at odds, but if you are someone who doesn't know what to say unless you read constantly from a piece of paper, then make sure you don't get up on stage and make speeches for a living!
Be Aware That Strengths May Be Weaknesses
I remember listing my strengths and weaknesses at a conflict management training course and our group discovered that often the same traits that our strengths are also our weakness. If you consider patience as one of your strengths, consider that as a strength this allows you the ability to wait until you receive an answer, and to be gentle with someone who is struggling to understand a concept. But where this might be a weakness is a tendency perhaps to wait too long, and to hold on to a situation that is hopeless. Another example might be impatience. Impatience sounds like a weakness, especially if you become too hasty and move forward too quickly, or get frustrated at someone you perceive is taking too long at a task, yet it may also be a strength in that it allows you to move quickly onto another idea, and to get things done in a short space of time. Wikipedia's strengths and weaknesses article mentions the concept of yin and yang, which are opposites that complement each other to form a complete whole. We all have strengths and weaknesses. Often we just need to learn to find balance in the use of our innate character traits.
Use Your Strengths
You will be worn down if you are constantly asked to work from a position of weakness. It is not about bringing weaknesses in line with your strengths, it is about rather using your strengths as much as possible and being aware of your weaknesses. Some weaknesses will always cripple you if that is the position you are trying to work from. If you work well on your own you may be able to work with a team but perhaps you will be better suited to working on the fringes of a group and providing your input indirectly as a hand off. I would love to see organisations that use their people in the best possible way, where staff members who find themselves doing a job they are unsuited to can craft the role that suits them best, instead of being tied down to a fixed job description where they may be setting themselves up for failure. Perhaps this is just a dream of mine and I may be the only one who wishes for this. I would have liked to change my role slightly where I used to work, instead of having to request a transfer if I wanted change. I know there are parts of a job that I just don't like to do and that have to be done, like taking out the garbage at home, but taking out the garbage is not necessarily a weakness it is just a job that needs to get done. Weaknesses are where we are not competent to do something well, yet we are often expected to use our weaknesses to succeed. Try not place yourself in situations where you need to use weaknesses more than your strengths.
A Square Peg In A Round Hole
If you feel like "a square peg in a round hole" where you work then this might mean you are trying to do something you are not good at, or you are in a situation that does not suit you. It’s never going to work easily. A solution might be to try find where your abilities fit better, perhaps a change in role or a different job. But remember: "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man." - George Bernard Shaw. Someone who seems to be hopeless at one job may start excelling when they are placed in the right role. I wrote about this concept in the blog article called: Everyone is a genius. Understanding and acceptance also goes a long way in helping someone blend in. Sometimes changing the way we respond to someone changes the way they act towards us and subsequently our view of them may change for the better.
In Conclusion
Identify your strengths and weaknesses. You may have a strength that needs a bit of work and therefore see what skills you may still need to acquire and think of ways to obtain these. Identify weaknesses you need to be aware of and that you may always have as part of you and plan accordingly. Everyone has a purpose and a role to play. Don't let your weaknesses handicap you from making your contribution. Always try to work from a position of using your strengths.
Use Your Strengths
You will be worn down if you are constantly asked to work from a position of weakness. It is not about bringing weaknesses in line with your strengths, it is about rather using your strengths as much as possible and being aware of your weaknesses. Some weaknesses will always cripple you if that is the position you are trying to work from. If you work well on your own you may be able to work with a team but perhaps you will be better suited to working on the fringes of a group and providing your input indirectly as a hand off. I would love to see organisations that use their people in the best possible way, where staff members who find themselves doing a job they are unsuited to can craft the role that suits them best, instead of being tied down to a fixed job description where they may be setting themselves up for failure. Perhaps this is just a dream of mine and I may be the only one who wishes for this. I would have liked to change my role slightly where I used to work, instead of having to request a transfer if I wanted change. I know there are parts of a job that I just don't like to do and that have to be done, like taking out the garbage at home, but taking out the garbage is not necessarily a weakness it is just a job that needs to get done. Weaknesses are where we are not competent to do something well, yet we are often expected to use our weaknesses to succeed. Try not place yourself in situations where you need to use weaknesses more than your strengths.
A Square Peg In A Round Hole
If you feel like "a square peg in a round hole" where you work then this might mean you are trying to do something you are not good at, or you are in a situation that does not suit you. It’s never going to work easily. A solution might be to try find where your abilities fit better, perhaps a change in role or a different job. But remember: "The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man." - George Bernard Shaw. Someone who seems to be hopeless at one job may start excelling when they are placed in the right role. I wrote about this concept in the blog article called: Everyone is a genius. Understanding and acceptance also goes a long way in helping someone blend in. Sometimes changing the way we respond to someone changes the way they act towards us and subsequently our view of them may change for the better.
In Conclusion
Identify your strengths and weaknesses. You may have a strength that needs a bit of work and therefore see what skills you may still need to acquire and think of ways to obtain these. Identify weaknesses you need to be aware of and that you may always have as part of you and plan accordingly. Everyone has a purpose and a role to play. Don't let your weaknesses handicap you from making your contribution. Always try to work from a position of using your strengths.
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